Daily DADvice

Dad tip #121: Sometimes you have to stop yourself from helping your baby

2008-09-10T20:11:00.005-04:00

There's nothing worse than seeing your child suffer even slightly, even for a moment. But sometimes you just have to stop yourself from interfering because in some instances, when your child struggles with something, they're learning from that experience.

Let's look at my son's first attempts at feeding himself Gerber Graduates banana puffs. The puffs are these star-shaped snacks designed to be finger-foods for babies. They pretty much disintegrate when salivated upon but only become sticky when lightly moistened. With less than stellar motor coordination and a tendency to drool in the presence of food -- or in the presence of pretty much anything, for that matter -- his early attempts at eating the treats resulted in sticky puffs stuck to the highchair, the floor, and my son's hands and cheeks. In fact, the puffs seemed to be pretty much everywhere but in my son's mouth.

After a few moments, the urge to help him overwhelmed us and we fed him a couple of puffs. He was hungry! But, we also quickly realized that he wasn't going to get any better at it if we didn't let him figure it out for himself. Now, he can put those suckers down right- or left-handed while contemplating quantum physics or thinking about the potential of CERN's newly functional Large Hadron Collider.

It's pretty much the same thing when it comes to eating with a spoon. However, that just takes more coordination, more patience, and more paper towels to clean up the mess. We're still working on that one.

Anyway, keep this advice in mind because it seems to apply to just about everything right now.

Dad tip #120: Don't blink because you might miss something

2008-09-08T20:08:00.003-04:00

Okay ... I took a longer vacation from this blog than I had originally intended. But, I'm sure it was needed and hopefully I'm a little re-invigorated from the hiatus.

My beautiful baby boy is now nine months old and, in the last 3+ weeks, a lot has happened. What you might ask? Well, my son learned to crawl (while attempting to reach a bottle of beer); he learned how to sit up (don't know how it happened, but one morning we looked at the baby monitor and there he was, sitting happy as can be); and he learned how to feed himself finger-food (delicious banana puffs).

He also learned how to kneel and he's able to stand (indefinitely) while holding on to something, but only if you stand him up. He hasn't learned how to actually stand up, but he's probably pretty close. Oh, he also tried (pureed) meat for the first time.

Anyhow, it feels like TONS has happened in a few short weeks. It's like a tiny cartoon snowball rolling down a hill and becoming a giant snow-boulder going a billion miles an hour. And yes, I'm describing both my son and the progress he's made!

So, the advice is actually less "Don't blink because you might miss something" and more "Holy crap! Get ready for your child's development to start picking up momentum."

Dad tip #119: Know when to take a break

2008-08-16T22:08:00.005-04:00

Okay, it's time to take a break. I'm going on a week-long vacation -- no, not a staycation and certainly not a nakation (if you don't know what those are, Google them) -- and aside from the possibility of having no internet access, I could just use a break from as many of my daily routine things as reasonable (including this blog).

I'm hoping to get some reading in and some nice relaxing family time with my wife and my son. In the meantime, please enjoy the picture of the green Maccha Milk Kit Kat above ("Gimme a break, gimme a break, break me off a piece of that Kit Kat bar") ... or enjoy some old articles related to poop.

Dad tip #118: Kids come up with great expressions for you to over-use

2008-08-15T22:25:00.004-04:00

We've had some friends and their kids in town, visiting from Oregon. One of their boys somehow came up with the following phrase:

"You crack me nuts!"

I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a variation of "You crack me up" or "You make me nuts"; or some weird pirate-speak or all of the above. Whatever it is, I like it and plan to over-use the expression in any scenario remotely warranting it.

It should be noted that I'm not going to be indiscriminately using kid-coined phrases all the time. This same child is also VERY fond of indicating to anyone that'll listen: "Let's get this party started!" I think it might be said with some kind of funny accent, too. But not an Oregon or pirate accent ... at least, as far as I can tell.

P.S. I also ended up watching parts of five Star Wars movies with this child in two days. Whew! That kid totally cracks me nuts.

Dad tip #117: Peekaboo is the game that never gets old

2008-08-14T23:52:00.003-04:00

In the context of an eight-month-old baby, Peekaboo really is the game that never seems to get old. If I'm in a jam for something to entertain my son with, I look for subtle variations of the game.

For example, here's a list of things that I've found myself hiding behind recently:

A Lamaze First Mirror
The couch
A burp cloth
Jacques the Peacock
My hand

I think the only thing you REALLY need to obscure, to make the game work, is eye contact. So, don't worry if there's nothing good around to hide behind; I'm sure there's something around that you can Peekaboo with.

P.S. I was just searching Amazon for the term "Peekaboo", looking for an image to associate with this post. There's a shocking dichotomy behind the results. Go take a look and see what you find.

Dad tip #116: Be thankful that you live in the United States

2008-08-13T21:22:00.006-04:00

The pseudo-advice tonight is: "Be thankful that you live in the United States."

Why such a fluffy topic tonight? Because I've been watching the Olympics like it's my job and it makes me sad to hear stories that a lot of China's athletes were essentially sent away from home at the age of three to begin their training with only one opportunity a year to see their parents.

Don't get me wrong, I'd be the proudest dad in the world if my son were to represent the United States in the Olympics some day. But, losing him for his entire childhood would be a deal-breaker. I don't care what the family gets from the government; and call me shallow if you want, but I don't think honor is worth that much.

That said, I'm now going to re-glue myself to the television as I await Michael Phelps's race tonight.

Dad tip #115: Going out with the baby takes practice

2008-08-12T20:28:00.004-04:00

I suppose it doesn't actually take practice to go out with the baby effectively. But, I think we've found that we feel a lot better about going out with the baby after having done it a few times.

You kind of have to get a routine for not only what you do with your child when you're actually out, but also what you do BEFORE you go out and what you do AFTER you get home. And on top of that, it's not only the routine, but also the timing of when you do everything.

After all, if your baby is happy, you've got a much better chance of having a good time away from the house. Set expectations for your baby and yourselves.

(This post was inspired by going out to dinner tonight with six adults and four kids.)

Dad tip #114: Facebook can help you "spend time" with your wife

2008-08-11T20:11:00.003-04:00

Okay. I'm sure all you dirty birds saw "spend time" in quotes and assumed that it was a euphemism for bumping uglies (which, of course, is also euphemism for something); but it's totally not. I actually mean "spend time". But it's in quotes because we might not actually be spending the exact same moments in time with each other.

For whatever reason -- work, baby, chores, personal hygiene breaks, etc. -- my wife and I can't always be in the same room at the same time. Facebook has been a shockingly functional way for us to still "spend time" together via Facebook apps; more specifically, through Facebook games like Scrabble or Scramble. You can start a game whenever you want and take turns whenever you have time.

You can also save the smack talking for whenever is most convenient, too.

Uh, I guess I should also admit that for some reason we've forsaken "real" Scrabble even when we are able to be in the same room at the same time. But it's kind of stupid because the Scrabble Facebook app is in beta and is obscenely buggy. We'd probably actually finish a real game of Scrabble much faster.

Oh well.

Dad tip #113: Babies are like ... Play-Doh Fun Factories

2008-08-10T20:45:00.003-04:00

Tonight's advice is the second in a series of "Babies are like" posts. The first post in the series compared babies to drunks, and had a virtual laundry-list of reasons why they're alike.

This post, on the other hand, will only have one REALLY GOOD reason why babies are like Play-Doh Fun Factories. Have you ever watched a commercial for the Play-Doh Fun Factory or ever watched one in action live? If you have, then prepare yourself for the very real possibility that you'll seeing something very similar during a diaper change.

I'm not referring to an ordinary diaper change. I'm referring to one where your child suddenly decides that they're not done pooping yet (mid-diaper change) and starts squeezing out as much additional poo as they can produce. If this scenario were to read like a GRE analogy it would look like:

Play-Doh : Fun Factory :: Poop : Your kid's butt-hole

So, the advice is, very simply, be prepared for it.

Dad tip #112: Do separate shirt and pant outfits result in more diaper blow-outs?

2008-08-09T21:32:00.006-04:00

I believe that when your baby wears separate shirt and pant outfits, that he's more prone to having a diaper blow-out. And when I say shirt, I'm NOT including onesies; I'm referring to the times that your baby wears something like a t-shirt with a pair of shorts.

I'm not sure there's actually a pattern or even true logic behind my theory, but I do feel like onesies somehow provide some additional support in containing the poop in the diaper. At the very least, onesies do help prevent you from accidentally pulling the diaper down when you remove the pants for a diaper change.

When blow-outs do occur in this scenario, you should consider yourself lucky if your baby's shirt buttons all the way down the front so you don't get into a situation where you're in danger of dragging poo through his hair. As you'll recall, we've inadvertently painted poo-racing stripes down our son's legs. Imagine how much worse it would be if you were painting the poo through your kid's hair.

Dad tip #111: Organize all your baby clothes

2008-08-08T20:03:00.006-04:00

People love to buy clothes for your baby. People also love to give you hand-me-downs. And YOU can't resist buying your baby clothes. What does this mean?

It means that you may end up with more clothes than your baby can reasonably wear for any given age range. If you're not REALLY organized, it's entirely possible that you'll find yourself with completely new and unworn outfits that your baby's already outgrown.

Grouping clothes by size is key. And by size, I mean by physical size and NOT by listed size as every manufacturer has their own ideas of what you can squeeze a baby into and/or how big a baby should be at any age. Progressively packing away clothes that are too small also helps with the baby wardrobe de-confusification.

My wife should consider this post a monumental "Thank you" for all the hard work she puts in to keep our boy's things in order. I don't always say it enough, but I really do appreciate it. I suspect if I were in charge, we'd be finding onesies hidden away when our son is old enough to vote.

(But I'm sure they'd be really awesome Star Wars onesies.)

Dad tip #110: Try to switch baby-carrying arms

2008-08-07T21:35:00.006-04:00

Try not to only use the same arm to carry your baby all the time. You're in danger of having a tired and sore arm; and of becoming some kind of demented, lop-sided Popeye.

Or maybe it's actually more like becoming some kind of less demonic, less sunburned Hellboy.

Dad tip #109: Pottery Barn Kids has vintage Star Wars bedding!

2008-08-06T20:19:00.004-04:00

Yup. The title says it all. Pottery Barn Kids has vintage Star Wars bed sheets!

I TOTALLY had those sheets as a kid. The advice here is that you too can relive your childhood. And major mainstream retailers are helping you do it. I mentioned a couple weeks ago how The Gap is selling all kinds of pop culture t-shirts, including Star Wars ones. And now, Pottery Barn is offering up Star Wars bedding.

I suppose I should also mention that Pottery Barn Kids also sells some Superman and Batman goodies, too. But, I think I might be able to build another separate post out of that topic another day.

P.S. I am soooooo ridiculously sad that the Star Wars sheets aren't available in king.

Geek parents unite!

Dad tip #108: Babies are like ... drunks!

2008-08-05T20:05:00.004-04:00

For a while now, I've been doing a series of "Beware the __blanking__ baby" posts in the form of haikus. Tonight's advice starts a new series of "Babies are like" posts where I'll compare babies to just about anything I can think of. Before I begin, I'd like to give credit where it's due and acknowledge that the basic idea was inspired by my wife and that tonight's edition comes straight out of my wife's mouth. In fact, she said:

"It's weird. Babies are like drunks. You can't understand them. They pee themselves. And you just want them to go to sleep!"

The main advice that I sort of take out of this is more along the lines of, "You can't reason with a drunk or with a baby, so you just have to suck it up and deal with it from time to time." That said, we came up with some other interesting similarities between drunks and babies:

You sometimes find them in parks.
Both have terrible senses of balance.
They'll get whatever they're eating or drinking all over themselves.
People call and ask how they're doing.
You might have an inclination to take embarrassing pictures of them.
You'll find them riding in the back seats of cars. In the case of drunks: police cars.

And yes, we realize some of these tidbits are more closely aligning babies with full-blown alcoholics, but they're still kind of true (and funny).

Dad tip #106: Amazon's "Birth to 24 months" toy store

2008-08-04T20:16:00.005-04:00

I'm wicked tired tonight. If you've been following this blog, then you know this is typically when I start spouting all kinds of Amazon.com propaganda (like my deal on Amazon Prime).

Tonight's theme is Amazon's "Birth to 24 months" toy store. It's fun to browse what toys your baby can play with. I only wish that they'd break up the "Birth to 24 months" section into even smaller subdivisions. Our kid is only 8-months-old, so it'd be really handy to narrow the search even further. But, it is kind of cool to take a peek at all the stuff that he'll be able to play with soon.

Among the age-appropriate things on the front page of the store was Jacques the Peacock by Lamaze. It's a ridiculously cute toy that has (according to the description): a soft velour body, busy wings with multiple textures and crinkles, a peek-a-boo mirror, and a squeaker. Our kid has TONS of toys like this, but I'm still tempted to buy one.

Among the less age-appropriate and possibly even questionable results was a "Dark Knight" Joker Bobblehead. Even if it's technically safe for kids 12 months and up, it's still kind of creepy. Do you really want to walk into your kid's room every day and see a miniature statue of Heath Ledger every day?

The last thing I'm going to post here tonight is just a reminder for myself to eventually go back and eventually buy the Baby Farm Friends Bowling by International Playthings. THAT is also WICKED cute.

Dad tip #106: Dinner time can be stressful

2008-08-03T17:52:00.003-04:00

Okay, here's dinner time around here:

Dinner cooking or leftovers reheating.
Cat meowing like CRAZY to be fed.
Baby starting to fuss because he's getting hungry too.
Uh oh, what's that smell? Is that dinner burning?
Whoops, tripped over the cat while trying to check on dinner.
Dinner's fine, get baby's food ready.
Get all the food on the table.
Everyone eat as fast as you can.
Baby finished his dinner first.
Get baby cleaned up.
Give him a toy to play with.
Eat more of your own dinner.
THUMP! Baby's toy is on the floor. Pick it up.
Try to finish your own dinner.
THUMP! Baby's toy is on the floor. Pick it up.
Try to finish your own dinner.
THUMP! Baby's toy is on the floor. Pick it up.
Try to finish your own dinner.
THUMP! Baby's toy is on the floor. Pick it up.
Try to finish your own dinner.
Repeat until baby's bedtime.

So, the advice here is just to get yourself in the right mindset that dinner isn't necessarily a relaxing time of day anymore. As long as your expectations are set realistically, you'll find that you can able to enjoy that hectic bit of time with your wife and baby as much as you ever enjoyed dinner time.

Really!

Dad tip #105: Sometimes it's cool to just hang out with the baby

2008-08-02T19:47:00.004-04:00

The title of this post isn't quite descriptive enough for me to get my point across. What I'm trying to say is, that while trying to keep your baby stimulated all the time is admirable, sometimes the best thing for your baby is to just hang out with him.

With your baby's happiness on your mind, it's easy to get caught in a loop where you're constantly taking your baby from activity to activity, from station to station, but sometimes all your baby needs is your company. In fact, we've found that one of our baby's favorite things is to just lay on the floor with me on one side and my wife on the other.

Give it a try ... it's also relaxing for you if your baby likes it.

Dad tip #104: Babies frequently learn to crawl backwards first

2008-08-01T20:09:00.004-04:00

I mentioned a couple of weeks ago how mobile our son had become by honing his ability to roll. I just thought I'd quickly follow that up with how much more mobile he's become as a result of his ability to pivot and essentially crawl backwards.

I guess it's technically not crawling. It's more like pushing himself backwards. And occasionally it's like crawl-pushing himself diagonally backwards-ish when he sticks one leg straight out to the side like a pole vaulter's pole in a weird way.

In any event, don't be surprised if this backwards mobility develops as I hear it's pretty common. Also don't be surprised if your kid gets himself stuck underneath stuff unintentionally. And lastly, don't be surprised if your baby ends up frustrated as a result of being stuck or as a result of his inability to move forwards.

For the record, our son is SOOOOOOOOO close to crawling forwards. He can get up on his hands and knees and shuffle forward a little but not enough to satisfy him. Sometimes he's also able to put a bunch of effort into one big lunge, but then he's kind of wiped out.

Dad tip #103: Teach your kids that it's not cool to push 64-year-olds

2008-07-31T21:22:00.004-04:00

I'm not sure how, exactly, but there's some kind of life-lesson to be extracted from the Manny Ramirez situation that's been slowly festering over the last eight years in Boston. While the Boston Red Sox have won two World Series with Manny, they (and the fans of Boston) have also had to deal with the "Manny being Manny" antics that included things like dogging it to first base, having to pee inside the Green Monster during a game, and generally being a goof ball.

All of these things were excusable because he was still very likable and he was putting up ridiculously good numbers. Unfortunately, in the past few weeks, the relatively harmless Manny-isms turned ugly VERY quickly as the offending actions suddenly included slapping a teammate in the dugout, pushing a 64-year-old Red Sox employee, and essentially hanging the team out to dry against hated rivals, the New York Yankees.

Ramirez, once a hero loved and embraced by the city of Boston, has now been run out of town. The perenial All-Star and future Hall-of-Famer was traded away in a three team deal. It doesn't even matter that much who we got back (Jason Bay from the Pittsburgh Pirates). What does matter is that we got rid of someone who was poisoning our beloved Red Sox from within.

Addition by subtraction, if you will.

So, my thought here is that one day I'll use the story of Manny Ramirez as some kind of parable illustrating that just because you've done (relatively) good things in the past doesn't mean that you can do whatever you want in the present and future. Or maybe I'll coin a new phrase from the tale like, "Good will is a currency fast spent."

Or perhaps, "$20 million a year doesn't buy you common sense or a sense of decency."

Or maybe even more simply, "Don't be a dick and push 64-year-old people."

Anyway, bye bye, Manny ... we appreciate the good you did for the Sox but are sad that you never loved us (the city, the fans, and your teammates) as much as we loved you. I hope my son never grows up to idolize a professional athlete who ends up being a total douche like you.

Dad tip#102: Beware the early-rising baby

2008-07-30T19:16:00.003-04:00

Tonight's advice will be in the form of a haiku:

Good morning, papa!
Late to bed, early to rise --
That is my motto!

The point of this post is not to have sleep expectations based on how early or how late your child goes to bed in relation to their usual routine. There is an old adage that "sleep begets more sleep" that I believe has a lot of truth to it. While there seems to be more consistency behind that expression than the thought that "the later they go to sleep, the later they should wake up," there really is no universal truth behind the sleep logic of a baby.

(Hmm ... I was just thinking that a funny web site would be one full of "baby logic," but upon investigation I just discovered that there appears to be a cyber-squatter sitting on that domain. Too bad.)

Dad tip #101: Appreciate every member of your family

2008-07-29T20:48:00.005-04:00

The summer already seems to be coming to something of a close as my sister and her family headed back to London yesterday and my parents will be heading back to Richmond in three days. It was really nice having everyone around regardless of what we were doing, because the more important thing was what we were just being: family.

Tonight, my parents came over to hang out. We had takeout Chinese for dinner, and then we watched the Boston Celtics 2007-2008 Championship Season DVD. What a totally chill and great way to unwind from work!

Plus, our son got to spend a little extra time with his grandparents who he TOTALLY recognizes and loves now; which really is awesome beyond words.

So, tonight's advice is just appreciate everyone in your family: your baby, your wife, your parents, your siblings, your in-laws ... everyone!

Dad tip #100: Boys start grabbing at their crotches pretty early

2008-07-28T21:14:00.007-04:00

Happy 100th post to me, happy 100th post to me, happy 100th post to me, happy 100th post tooooooooo meeeeeeeeee!

Tonight's advice is more of a warning than anything else: Boys will naturally start grabbing at their crotches pretty early in life. As a result, right around when our son turned seven months, it became ridiculously difficult to change his diaper.

Why? Well for starters, his being much more alert and thus more distractible made the diaper change that much more challenging -- as did the ability to roll over. BUT, it's really his continuous grasping toward his nether-regions that makes the diaper change a little crazy and unnerving. Back in dad tip #10, I suggested placing a baby wipe over a baby boy's penis to avoid being peed on. Now, just 90 posts later, that advice has been completely negated because as soon as you put a wipe on our boy's penis, he's yanked it off and is pulling it toward his mouth. (And in case there's a misplaced modifier or some such in that sentence, it's the wipe he's yanked off and NOT his penis.)

Ick!

Furthermore, after taking the wipe away from him, he starts reaching directly for his penis. He's definitely found it and tried to grab it, but I'm not sure he's figured out that it's attached.

I should clarify that our boy isn't a weirdo constantly grabbing his crotch like Michael Jackson. He's just doing it during diaper changes.

For now.

Dad tip #99: Don't be too impressed with yourself; babies are easily amused

2008-07-27T20:26:00.006-04:00

So, my family is in town visiting -- my parents, sister, brother-in-law, niece, and nephew. My wife, my son, and I were all sitting around with our visiting family tonight and some how three practice tennis balls started flying around the room. At one point, all three balls ended up in front of me and I began juggling.

My nearly 8-month-old son broke out in full-on belly-laughter and my 19-month-old nephew seemed to giggle his agreement that the juggling was, in fact, impressive and entertaining. With this encouragement, I added in a couple of simple ball tricks and changed up the juggling pattern a few times. And the laughter continued.

Then my dad, the most practical human being on the planet, suggested, "I think he'll be just as entertained if you just move one ball up and down in the air while holding it." Sure enough, the "simplified juggling" of one ball was sufficient to keep my son laughing.

Oh well.

I'm SURE that juggling will eventually be impressive to my son. I'll just count myself lucky that he's easily amused right now because it would be a pain if I had to jump through all kinds of crazy hoops to keep him happy. I'm not saying I wouldn't do it; it would just be a lot more tiring.

Dad tip #98: Amazon has a "Green Baby" section

2008-07-26T21:26:00.008-04:00

Okay, it's getting late and I'm feeling a little uninspired, so I'm going to one of my regular fall-backs: Amazon. Today, I'm going to talk about Amazon's "Green Baby" section (even though we're not the greenest household in the world).

If you happen to be "Green" and you're looking for a great selection of eco-friendly products to support your lifestyle (and your baby's lifestyle), you might as well give Amazon a go. -- particularly if you get free shipping as an Amazon Prime member. I have to admit that a lot of the "Baby Green" contents are a little beyond me, but I'll go ahead and list some of the more interesting things I found:

gDiapers disposable diaper liners
Bamboozle fitted diapers constructed from bamboo fibers
Baby soy clothing made from, umm, soy

I suppose the few rudimentary bits of advice that you could strain out of this post are that you can even be environmentally conscious when it comes to your baby and that you don't necessarily need to go to some expensive boutique shop to get it done.

Oh, and that there are some really cute baby items that happen to be green (like the Pixel Organics "Lions, Tigers and Kitties ... Oh My" Organic Crib Set).

Dad tip #97: Babies need time to adjust to new food

2008-07-25T20:31:00.005-04:00

This morning, when introducing our son to smooshed avocado for the first time, I was reminded that he's rarely ever had a distinct positive reaction to a new food or even a clear neutral reaction. Usually, there's some grimacing or even flinching of some kind once he's realized that he's tasting something he's never eaten before.

I suppose this stands to reason. If I were a baby and I had the tendency to stick everything and anything in my mouth, I might be surprised if I tasted something different that might actually be edible.

For instance, the first time we gave our boy apples, there was a lot of head shaking and squinting; basically the same reaction an adult might have if sucking on a really sour lemon. But, after the next couple of exposures to apples, he couldn't get enough. So, the advice is to not necessarily take their initial reaction as gospel as babies do apparently need some time to adjust to new food.

HOWEVER, Gerber 1st Food Peaches smell like @#$%! No really. They actually make my wife gag when she smells them. After several attempts at feeding them to our son (for which we sort of feel guilty now), we're convinced that he doesn't like them. We'll give fresh pureed peaches a go at some point, but we probably won't ever subject our child to the putrid concoction that is Gerber peaches.

Sadly, it seems, avocados are not on our baby's favorite food list either. But I'm sure that someday he'll love them on a big juicy bacon cheese burger smothered in swiss.

Ahhh ... some day.